


How to get away with murder

by Nerdqueenofthepumpkins



Series: The coven AU [1]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Alternate Universe - Magic, Attempted Murder, Gen, HQ Brofest Apprentice Tier, Murder, Witch AU, friends that hide bodies together stay together, hqbrofest, poor Shirabu, rated T for language and blood
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-03
Updated: 2017-05-04
Packaged: 2018-10-27 19:31:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 5,288
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10815291
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nerdqueenofthepumpkins/pseuds/Nerdqueenofthepumpkins
Summary: Or how Semi finally snaps and kills Shirabu, then promptly freaks out and enlists Tendou to help him conceal the murder. It doesn’t go as planned. At all.





	1. Local swan mom fucks up

A few years ago, when younger members of the Shiratorizawa coven joined, Reon had the great idea to organize a slumber party to welcome everyone in. At some point, the witches were playing “Who’s more likely”, with disgusting potions, courtesy of Hayato, and even more disgusting regular alcohol, brought to the swans by Tendou, and Tsutomu, maybe to figure out who to befriend, said:

“Who’s more likely to stab someone they know?”

 “As in an accident or on purpose?” Reon asked, slightly troubled by the new recruit’s worries. 

“As in to murder them,” Tsutomu answered.

“The real question is who would be murdered,” Satori laughed. “Personally, I think Kenjirou is more likely get stabbed in the gut.”

“Why me?!”

“Because you’re an ambitious bastard with no respect for your elders,” Semi retorted. “Though I’m more of a poison kind of guy, I’d definitely stab you in the stomach.”

“I second that,” Taichi nodded. 

“Hey!” Kenjirou protested. “You’re supposed to be my friend!”

“Doesn’t mean I won’t put a death curse on you if you push my buttons,” the said friend shrugged. “You tend to do that, and you know it.”

“Raise your hand if you think Kenjirou is totally killable!” Hayato exclaimed.

Almost everyone confessed they would try to kill Shirabu in the right situation that night, even Wakatoshi. Shirabu was offended of course, but being stabbed didn’t mean much to him anyway. He was more upset about having to finish that gross, mud-colored potion and thought nothing of it for years.

 

Semi doesn't know why this particular event suddenly comes back to him today. Probably because he is standing over Shirabu Kenjirou’s lifeless body, blood all over his hands and his shirt, a sacrificial knife coated in more blood in his trembling hands.

 

Semi isn’t sure he’s feeling anything at the moment. Ah, yes. He is feeling at peace, strangely. Or maybe he is just in a daze and the peacefulness is fake. He is almost waiting for the panic to rise because, for goodness’s sake, _he has just killed a man_. It wasn’t in cold blood, and it’s not permanent, so at least there’s that, but he has still killed a man, and a fellow member of his coven to boot. Shirabu will be so pissed when he wakes up and discovers Semi has finally fulfilled the coven’s dark prophecy and stabbed him with his own sacrificial knife. There is blood all over the wall, that will be a pain to clean up, and his shirt is ruined.

 

Shirabu still isn’t moving.

 

It has been 3 minutes and Shirabu still isn’t moving. For a second, fear takes over Semi, because oh god what if Kenjirou is actually dead? This cannot be happening, Shirabu was the only person in Sendai blessed by the Cat’s spirit, he had at least nine lives, and as much as Semi knew, he had only died twice before. Has. He _has_ only died twice before. There is no need to use the past tense to refer to Shirabu because he isn’t dead. His spirit is somewhere in limbo but will come back in a matter of minutes. Or so Semi hopes.

 

Fifteen minutes later, Shirabu’s spirit is still far from his body, and horror creeps over Semi’s face.

 

“Shit,” he murmurs, kneeling down in front of his dead friend. “Shit, shit, _fuck_ \- No. No way. Oh God. Oh my God. Shirabu, get up. Stop this bullshit and wake up. This is not happening oh my God-”

 

Semi tries to sense Shirabu’s aura, his energy, anything. He can’t find anything. Shirabu’s trail remains cold, and Semi starts freaking out for good. He tries to bring him back, he tries to attach Kenjirou’s essence to his body like he did two weeks ago when a lost curse hit Tsutomu right in the head, but there is nothing to tie down. Shirabu Kenjirou is passing on, and there is nothing Semi can do. He can just stare at his corpse, leaking all sorts of fluids and staining Washijou-sensei’s carpet even further.

 

Semi wants to scream. He wants to cry, to hurl, to disappear, hell, to be in Shirabu’s place. But he is frozen, watching in silent horror as his friend’s body slowly becomes colder and paler. And finally, Semi realizes that if Shirabu is as still as a statue right now, it is because of _him_ , he has killed him. If someone finds out, he might be kicked out of the coven, or get arrested, or maybe even sentenced to death. He has to get rid of the evidence, or it is the end for him.

 

Semi finally throws up, fortunately not on Shirabu’s corpse (oh God, his _corpse_ ). The idea that his friend, the brilliant witch, his kouhai, is dead, makes Semi’s head spin. The idea that he is responsible and that he has to hide it to save his own skin makes him positively sick. But he doesn’t have the time to be sick, he has to clean up this mess, he has to calm down. He also needs help, because even with magic as good as Wakatoshi’s it’s impossible to move a dead body and get rid of all traces of foul play on your own.

 

So Semi takes a deep breath, cleans his mouth and dials a number he is never happy to call, praying for him to actually pick up this time.

 

“Semi, what’s wrong?”

“I fucked up, Satori. I fucked up, I fucked up so bad, I-”

“What did you do? I’m coming to help, but you have to tell me what’s wrong.”

“He’s dead! I killed him! I killed Kenjirou!”

 


	2. Lizard man makes a promise

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Tendou is more level headed than Semi, for once. Well, someone has to be.

Tendou is used to hearing variations of the words “murder” and “Shirabu” in the same sentence from Semi. In fact, if he received a 5-yen coin every time Semi told him “I swear Satori someday I’m going to murder Shirabu”, he’d be rich enough to buy a flat for Semi and himself so he wouldn’t be around Kenjirou so often. But nonetheless, Tendou stays silent and astonished for a full minute when Semi breaks down on the phone and tells him:

“He’s dead! I killed him, Satori! I killed Kenjirou!”

Tendou isn’t sure how to react. He is sad, even outraged of course, Shirabu is- was his beloved kouhai. He is surprised too, the fact that Kenjirou is dead is a wonder in itself, he still had half a dozen lives left. Semi is powerful, but there is no way he could annihilate them all out of pure rage with a plain sacrificial knife. But more importantly, Tendou is worried, because his friend was angry enough to stab his kouhai with his own knife several times, and is now freaking out. Semi is clearly upset, who wouldn’t be, and Tendou has a feeling he could do something really stupid if left unsupervised any longer.

 

When Tendou finally gets to Semi, who had the good idea to put up a concealing charm on the room, he is greeted by a scene he expected from a horror movie. The wall and the carpet are splashed with blood, the room smells awful, Semi’s aura is all over the place and he is nowhere to be seen. The sacrificial knife is on the floor, still coated in Shirabu’s blood, rests on the carpet near his body, and speaking of Shirabu’s body… Tendou shivers when he sees his kouhai’s pale face distorted in pain, a small cut on his neck but three deep stab wounds to his abdomen. Semi has also landed a blow straight to Kenjirou’s heart and left lung. The poor boy had no chances of surviving that one without his feline blessing.

 

“Oh, Eita, what have you done,” Tendou whispers, kneeling down in front of Shirabu to close his eyes. 

“Help me,” Semi whimpers from a dark corner of the room.

 

He is shaking, there are specks of blood in his hair and all over his face, but the tears silently streaming down his face are slowly erasing those. He looks empty, desperation and guilt written all over his aura. Tendou rushes to hug him, and Semi takes a sharp breath before he starts sobbing on Tendou’s shoulder.

 

“Shh, it’s gonna okay,” Tendou says automatically, rubbing his back. 

“No, it’s not!” Semi almost quacks. “This is the end! I killed him, and now I’m going to jail, and… Oh no.”

“Hey, you called me to help you cover up, I’m not letting you down man! Things will be fine, I promise.”

“That’s the problem! Satori, you idiot! I’m so sorry, I dragged you into this, but maybe if you leave now you won’t get in trouble.”

“Are you crazy? I’m not leaving you alone to deal with this!”

“Satori, get out.” 

“You’re not making any sense.” 

“Get out of here before it’s too late!”

“I’m not letting you down! Eita, look at me! We’re in this together!” 

The only answer he gets is a low wail and a half-assed push spell. So Semi is still hysterical and incoherent. Tendou considers getting some of Hayato’s chamomile potion to calm him down. He decides against it in the end, because leaving the room rises the chances of people noticing something weird going on in that area, plus Hayato would definitely ask a ton of question. Instead, he starts humming the most soothing tune he can think of, infusing as much magic as he can in the sound.

 

“It’s been a while since you’ve hummed anything,” Semi remarks softly when he finally calms down. 

“Yeah, well, freaking people out with super accurate predictions and eldritch visions is way more fun,” Tendou grins. “The soft humming doesn’t really go with that aesthetic.”

“Don’t worry, your hair and fashion sense already kills the Silent Hill aesthetic,” Semi replies with a cheeky grin. “I mean they’re scary on their own, but not in an eerie, creepy way. 

“Rude, Semi-Semi!”

“Please don’t use that tone again, you sound like Oikawa,” Eita sighs.

 

They get up, the faint smile leaving Semi’s face as reality catches up with him again. Tendou’s magical humming worked, he is much calmer and more poised now. He sadly acknowledges that the only way to get away with killing Shirabu is to see it in the most clinical way possible. Calling Tendou was a great idea, he might be the best person to call if you want to make something disappear around Sendai, maybe even in the whole prefecture. But Semi still feels guilty of putting his friend in troubles when he is the only one to blame.  

“Are you sure about this?” He asks one last time.

“Certain. What do you think friends are for?"

"Not hide a body, usually..." Semi mumbles.

"Come on, let’s pay Kenjirou-kun our final respects!” Tendou says as if he hasn't heard him.

"Do you have a plan?" His friend inquires softly, and Tendou almost wants to laugh, as terrible as this sounds.

"I have plans for the wildest situations, you have no idea."


	3. Prime-time TV didn't prepare them for this

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> How to clean a crime scene for dummies.

Moving a dead body is way more difficult than one would expect at first glance. Semi knew guilt made things feel worse, but Shirabu’s 65 kilograms felt much heavier when he tried to lift him manually. Maybe the spell to stop his body from leaking more fluids adds some weight.

 

“I swear, he wasn’t that heavy when alive,” Semi groans, trying to drag the body away from the wall.

“Why aren’t we using magic again?” Tendou asks, taking the legs.

“Because if someone finds out Shirabu died here, their first reflex will be to check for residual magic,” Semi sighs. “Transporting a witch blessed by the Cat spirit asks for a lot of energy, we’d definitely get identified.” 

“Right. It’s weird, though.” 

“You’ll have to be more precise, this whole situation is bizarre. What do we do now?”

“We need a large cloth, maybe a rag, to get him out of here. We roll him up like a spring roll and we get him in the car.”

“You’ve just ruined spring rolls for me,” Semi mumbles.

 

Tendou looks around, but there isn’t a rag large enough to carry Shirabu out and cutting the carpet is not an option.

 

“You did plan this in advance, right?” Semi dares ask.

“Yes! Maybe. A bit?” 

“Satori!”

“It’s not like I carry large cover in my car waiting for you to commit murder!”

 “Wakatoshi has one,” Semi remarks. “For his barbecue.”

 “We can borrow it.” Tendou suggests.

 “Oh, no, Satori, we can’t steal from Wakatoshi…”

 “Eita, you have literally murdered someone today, and stealing is nothing to me at this point. Besides, I said borrow. As soon as we’re done, we’ll wash it and give it back. He’ll never find out!”

 “No, no we can’t do this.”

 

They do. Tendou quietly leaves the room and Semi waits at least five minutes before slipping out of the murder scene too and watches his companion of misfortune chat up Wakatoshi, who honestly deserves none of the problems that may come his way because Semi couldn’t control himself. After casting a quieting spell on Wakatoshi’s car, Semi pops the trunk open and takes the blue, plastic cover and gets back to the room as unsuspiciously as possible. The levels of crushing guilt are reaching astonishing heights that day.  

By the time Tendou gets back, Semi has expanded the cover to roll Shirabu into the creepiest spring roll ever, but now with the question of weight comes up the question of size.

 

“How exactly are we getting him into the car without attracting attention again?” Semi asks as Tendou almost cheerfully ties up the dead Shirabu spring roll.

“I was thinking about shrinking him,” Tendou replies. 

“We could have done that earlier! Why didn’t you say so?!” 

“Because I wasn’t sure of the effects of a shrinking spell from me,” Tendou shrugs. “Last time I tried to pull one, stack of paper was super small, but really dense, who knows what it can do to a human body.” 

“Satori, he’s dead. I don’t think he’ll mind if his body still weights 65 kilograms even though it’s the size of a paper clip.”

“Not so sure about that,” Satori murmurs.

“Besides,” Semi continues without hearing him, “I can pull off the spell without a hitch, so we are shrinking him.”

 

After getting a much smaller and much lighter corpse, they decide to take care of the crime scene. The wall seems bloodier with every passing minute to Semi, although this might also be the guilt speaking. Luckily Tendou has actually planned this part and hands Semi some state of the art cleaning supplies, they are probably more expensive than Tsutomu’s tuition.

 

“Where the hell did you get these cleaning supplies?” Semi can’t help but ask.

“Someone gave them to me,” Tendou shrugs.

“Please tell me you didn’t steal them,” his friend sighs.

“Who do you think I am?” Satori almost sounds offended.

“The guy who told Taichi there was a tax from seniors on Shounen Jump magazines,” Semi retorts.

“That was for Jump! My grandma gave me these.”

“I thought your grandmother died three years ago?”

“She left them for me in her will.”

“She left you expensive cleaning supplies? Is here a story behind this?” 

“Yup.” 

“Do I want to know about this story?”

“Nope.”

 

Tendou shakes his head ferociously and something tells Semi the story is really embarrassing, but since his name isn’t Tendou Satori, he won’t press the matter. Instead, he uses surprisingly corrosive products that are not magic in any way to clean up the stains on the wall and the sacrificial knife. He tries not to damage it too much; he wants it with Shirabu when they bury him. It is a beautiful knife, with a curvy and solid silver blade. Semi polishes it, carefully cleans the wooden handle and even almost cuts himself on the blade, but it was the least he could do for Shirabu.

 Meanwhile, Tendou uncaps a bottle of cola and empties it on the carpet before attacking it with a flash knife. Semi almost has a heart attack as his friend enthusiastically knifes the expensive beige carpet. Unfortunately, he is apparently right to do that, as the blood went right through the carpet to stain the floor. After cleaning the wood, Tendou expands the carpet to cover the missing spot, much to Semi’s dismay:

 

“What did I say about using magic in this room?” He whisper-shouts. “They’ll think you were trying to hide a blood stain!”

“No, they’ll think I was trying to hide a cola stain,” Tendou says. “I even got you an alibi, that way! Why do you think I doused the carpet in it?”

“Because you can use cola to remove blood stains!”

“What? Where d’you get that?”

“Wakatoshi told us, how do you not know that?” 

Tendou shrugs and finishes to brush the carpet. Except for the rolled up cloth with Shirabu’s shrunk down body, the room is perfectly clean, maybe a bit too clean, actually. Tendou says he will take care of it, along with taking the body to the car. Semi goes in Shirabu’s room to fill a suitcase with enough clothes and toiletries for a short trip. Then he takes the case to Tendou’s car, mentioning to some of the people he meets on the way that Shirabu left this morning to visit his mother, but forgot his second suitcase.

 Eventually, Semi sits in the passenger seat and Tendou closes the hood of the car, and they drive off to god knows where to hide the body.


	4. Shovel talk

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Disposing of a witch's body is fairly easy... If it's the right witch you're trying to bury.

It feels like hours before Tendou stops at a remote gas station to buy some snacks and fill up the tank. Semi sighs in relief as his companion climbs out of the car and turns off the radio. Tendou has been singing to cheerful J-pop songs during most of the drive as if he knew each and every song that came out of the radio. Semi doesn’t know how he does it, he only wants to curl up in silence and listen to his heart beating erratically with guilt. Maybe it is Satori’s way to cope with what he’s doing. If he finds a way to live with it, it is good for him, Semi cannot take that away from him. After all, Satori isn’t the one who stabbed and killed one of the kids he was supposed to watch after.

 

“Hey, Semi-Semi!” Tendou exclaims, tapping on Semi’s window and scaring the daylights out of him. “I got you ice cream!”

“Wha- why?” Eita muttered, rolling down his window.

“’Cause I could feel your sadness and your guilt all the way to the dairy aisle of the shop, and you always feel better after some ice cream,” Satori says like it is obvious.

“Thanks. Hey, can I drive? If I don’t do something soon, I’ll end up blowing something up.”

“Sure, but eat the ice cream first, kay? Trust me, you’ll feel better.”

 

The weirdest thing is that Satori is right. The ice cream helps a bit, it clears Semi’s head, and even if he still thinks he is responsible and deserves the worst for killing Shirabu and trying to cover it up, he feels a bit less sad and guilty. Maybe there was something in the ice cream, or maybe Satori just knows Semi really well. Eita decides to let Tendou enjoy his J-pop in peace if it’s his ice cream.

 

They drive for hours after that, and at some point, Tendou asks the question Semi has been expecting, and not in a good way.

 

“So,” Tendou says, and Semi just knows, “you’ve been threatening Kenjirou since you felt like he stole your spotlight in Wakatoshi-kun’s eyes, but nothing ever happened. What made you snap?” 

“I don’t know,” Semi says, not wanting to relive the event one bit. But Tendou’s persistent gaze makes him slightly more comfortable and he feels like he owes Tendou an explanation since he’s he is an accomplice now.

“I caught him talking shit about one of the younger ones behind his back,” Semi eventually says. “Not Tsutomu, but all kouhais are kouhais and it is our duty to protect them.”

“That doesn’t sound like Shirabu,” Tendou remarks. 

“I know, that’s why I confronted him. And he was in the middle of cutting things for an incantation that looked really freaky, so when I called him out he had a knife and some pretty powerful herbs. And you know what, he tried to pick a fight with me. He said some messed up things, and then, when he saw I didn’t react, he insulted my dad. He sneered and I- I don’t know, I lost it, we fought, and I—” 

“It’s okay, take your time,” Tendou says, and it is so out of character for him that Semi almost laughs. Instead, he takes a deep breath and continues:

“I don’t remember much, but in the end, all I can remember is feeling blind rage and wanting for him to suffer. And then, I- I don’t know, I woke up for that blind rage with blood everywhere and Shirabu was dead.”

“Just like that?” 

“Yes Satori, people tend to die just like that when you stab them 6 times in vital organs.”

“But doesn’t it seem weird that he had 9 lives and still died?”

“I don’t know Satori, I thought it was just a phase, and that he’d be better after a cool down. I really expected him to come back. I did everything to get him back, but it never worked.”

 

The car is silent for a moment, then Satori says:

“Stop the car!”

“What the hell?!”

“I have to check on Shirabu’s body!” Tendou explains.

“He is dead, and you’re no coroner, you won't get anything out of this,” Semi warns him, but he stops the car anyway.

 

They are in the middle of nowhere, somewhere in the countryside between Sendai and Kyoto as far as Semi can tell, and the road is surprisingly clear. Semi assembles a table out of the rocks on the side on the road and helps Tendou transport Shirabu’s corpse on the makeshift table. He leaves Tendou to his study and observes from the car, fighting off the waves of nausea he feels coming upon seeing Shirabu’s body. Tendou pouts and frowns, then casts a reversing spell, hoping to get Shirabu back to his original size to see him better. Nothing happens.

 

“Uh, Eita?” Tendou calls. “How difficult is it to break your spells?”

“About as difficult as it is to break yours,” Semi answers with a confused frown. “What’s going on?”

“Can you try to un-shrink him? It’s not working for me.”

With a sigh, Semi walks to the table and undoes the spell. Or at least he tries, but every time he tries, the plastic cover grows but the body stays the same.

"Satori, he's not growing back to his normal size," He says. "What the hell. That's definitely not supposed to happen now, he cannot even interfere with my magic, he isn't alive!"

Sensing his friend may freak out again, Tendou shrinks back the covers and comments that it actually helps them with disposing of Shirabu's remains. They put him back in the car and Semi drives off, narrowly avoiding another breakdown.

 

Tendou's weirdness sensor is tingling, there is something very wrong about the body in his car. Actually, his instincts have been telling him something was off since he saw the dead body, but Semi's dismay distracted him from that gut feeling. He doesn't say anything, though, he doesn't want to give Semi false hope. The feeling only gets stronger when they reach a field vast enough to perform the mortuary ceremony in peace.

  

Semi is very gentle with the ceremony, even more than usual, probably as a way to apologize to Shirabu. He produces a white cloth out of thin air and shrouds the corpse, before igniting the branch of sage Tendou had brought. Satori holds his hand as he softly recites the custom prayers. Eventually, it is time to set Kenjirou’s human shell free, and Tendou says with a regretful smile:

“It was nice knowing you, Shirabu. Hope next time you get blessed by the Cat it actually holds up.”

Semi is on the verge of tears again, the only words he manages to say are “I am so sorry”, then the two companions cast the last burial spell and wait for the body to catch fire.

Only Shirabu’s corpse doesn’t ignite. It stays there, unaffected, and here’s another thing that definitely should not happen but is anyway. The only reason the body wouldn’t be burning right now would be because Semi and Tendou have made a mistake on the name during the burial incantation. But two senior witches making the same mistake is unlikely.

 

“Eita,” Tendou says, his voice way too serious for Semi’s comfort, “I think we have a big problem.”

“You don’t say,” he snaps back. “You think Shirabu never gave us his real name?”

“Nah, I’m pretty sure this isn’t Shirabu, that’s what’s been bugging me all along.”

Semi stays stunned for a moment, then whispers:

“If this isn’t Shirabu… Then who did I kill?”


	5. That one time crows were not into murders

Suga has heard a lot of completely crazy things in his life. He thinks he is mostly immune to human randomness and stupidity, but when Semi Eita calls him to ask for his help, he is more than surprised. Eita never calls for help, unless it's an emergency.

 

“What’s up?” He asks. 

“I may or may not have killed Shirabu,” Eita answers.

“ _What_?!”

“Emphasis on may not!” 

“How did that even happen? Shirabu cannot be killed in one go!” 

“That’s the thing! Satori and I have noticed a lot of weird shit when trying to dispose of the body. I need your help to figure out if it’s really him.”

“Wait, the ketchup rabbit is here?” Suga groans, pulling a face that would have made Kenma proud. 

“What happened between you guys? When I told Satori I was calling Karasuno, he slumped on the floor and wailed that it couldn’t be happening in the most dramatic voice ever.”

“He was an asshole to my kouhais, that’s a declaration of war in my book.”

 

Semi sighs, and in the background, Suga can hear Tendou’s unpleasant cackles. This will be a very long day, he thinks.

 

“Look, I’m sorry about you and Satori,” Eita says, “but can you put your differences aside and help me, please?” 

“I will, just give me an address,” Suga answers. “I’m bringing Kageyama with me, this reeks of physical demonic breach and he’s good with those.”

 

Ten minutes later, Suga and Kageyama arrive in the middle of the countryside, in front of a ramen shop. The first thing they spot is Tendou’s loud hair, Kageyama stiffens slightly and Suga outwardly cringes. It gets slightly better when Semi sees them and gets out of the shop to greet them. Suga immediately runs to hug him.

 

“How are you holding up?” He asks softly when they part.

“I’ve been better,” Semi mutters. “I just need to know if I really did it.”

“Let’s go, then.”

 

They have to drive even further away to avoid suspicion, and during the whole trip, Tendou and Suga are bickering. It’s mainly name calling and childish banter and Kageyama looks awkwardly at Semi as if to apologize for his senpai’s behavior. Semi doesn’t mind though; they stop the car before it gets too annoying. For the third time that day, Semi and Tendou pull out Shirabu’s shrunk body out of the car and lay him on the ground.

 

“Holy shit,” Kageyama murmurs.

“Am I really the only one with no murderous intent toward my apprentice?” Suga sighs.

“There’s Moniwa,” Tendou says offhandedly.

“Kaname doesn’t count, he is unable to feel hatred,” Semi replies. 

 

Kageyama ignores the conversation and kneels next to the corpse, that's a bit too blue for Semi's comfort. He whispers an incantation 

 

“He was taller than that,” Tobio remarks after a moment of observation.

“Yeah, Satori had the great idea to make him smaller to transport him, and we can’t reverse it.” 

“No, this creature is too small to be Shirabu,” Kageyama shakes his head. “You lifted every spell cast on him and most of its glamor, right, Suga-san?” 

“Yes,” Suga nods. “Good job, Kageyama-kun.”

“Really?!” The members of the Shiratorizawa coven shout. There is a lot of relief in their voices and Suga can’t help but grin. 

“But wait, how did you know that?” Tendou asks. 

“Wait, if this isn’t Shirabu, who’s this?” Semi asks at the same time. “And more importantly, where is Shirabu?”

“Maybe try to call him?” Suga suggests. "I doubt it has it, it looks like a trickster or a shape-shifting demon to me and they don't do well with phones."

"We'll need further research to figure out exactly what that creature is," Kageyama says, pulling a face. "We have to bring it back with us."

"You think Ennoshita and Tsukishima will know what we're dealing with?"

Kageyama nods, and his face makes Semi think asking those two for help is even worse than dealing with a possible shape-shifting demon. 

"Oh, Tsukishima-kun!" Tendou exclaims with a shit eating grin that makes Suga's eyebrow twitch. "How is he, by the way?"

"He's still an ass," Tobio mumbles, and Satori starts cackling.

 

Semi lets Tendou catch up with the Karasuno witches and dials Shirabu's phone number. It rings several times until Taichi picks it up, and once again panic runs through Semi's veins when his kouhai tells him Shirabu's phone has been sitting on his desk for the past week.

 

Shirabu has been missing for a week and _no one_ noticed.

 

"Satori, we are terrible people," Semi says when Suga and Kageyama are gone.

"What else is new?" 

"We really have to find Kenjirou," Semi continues. "I have a really bad feeling about this."

"Hey, maybe he's on a tropical island and he forgot his phone!" Tendou suggests. "Remember how all his magic stuff and summer clothes were gone? Occam's razor works for us too, you know."

"Don't be ridiculous, he would have told us," Eita shakes his head. "Last time he went to Tokyo, he wouldn't stop talking about his trip for weeks."

"Well, the best way to track him down is to use Tsutomu, so let's go home," Tendou shrugs. They already know thanks to Taichi."

"Yeah, I guess you're right," Semi sighs.

 

The ride back home is a bit lighter, they even remember to clean Wakatoshi's barbecue cover. Tendou passes the time by counting the dogs on the street and singing dramatically to more J-pop songs. Semi asks about what happened the last time Tendou visited Karasuno and the only answer he gets is a wink, which means Wakatoshi or Reon will have to answer that one, and that Semi probably won't like that anecdote. 

They were about two kilometers away from the house when they spot him. Semi is falling asleep when suddenly Tendou hits the breaks and the tires screech on the asphalt.

 

"Satori what thE FUCK-"

"It's Kenjirou!" Tendou hollers, rolling down his window. "Kenjirou! Hey!"

"Oh my God! Shirabu get in here!" Semi screams, with way more relief and joy than he'd ever display normally.

 

Shirabu Kenjirou pauses, a frown of confusion on his face, not understanding why suddenly his seniors are so happy to see him and even urging him to get in their car. Especially Semi-senpai, who looks absolutely hysterical. Shirabu shrugs, visibly puts on his headphones and starts walking towards the opposite direction.

 

"What the- Shirabu you little shit!" Semi yells after him. "I'll kill you one day, I swear!"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And this is it! I finally managed to finish posting this! Thank you so much for reading, I hope you liked it!


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